OOAK Table Tennis Forum

Many of you may not be aware of this, but my son Taiyo has Autism. On facebook I have been sharing a series of awareness or diary posts in homage to Autsim Awareness Month. As this is an international forum, and most of you I consider friends, I thought it might be a good idea to share here as well.
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World Autism Month Post 1:

PSA:
When you are out and about and you hear an inconsolable kid screaming blood murder and misbehaving in public, please consider the possibility the child has autism (or some other condition) that make them that way. The parent is also likely mortified and desperately trying to stop the situation and prevent it from escalating. These kids often CANNOT be managed with conventional parenting tactics. You cannot rationalize during outbursts, and you cannot intellectualize how to deal with it. No two moments are the same.

Thankfully, these moments are becoming less and less a thing for Taiyo, but when it does, his triggers make him literally fear for his life. It could be a car starting, or spotting a fire alarm, or a sudden change in environment...things "neurotypicals" would never find threatening.

Instead of your judgement or criticism, please offer your empathy and seek to help or mitigate the escalation rather than commenting under your breath that the kid is a brat. (I was that person at one time until I had to take care of an ASD kid in Nursing School).

Besides, some of these kids are likely to do your taxes, perform surgery, or solve complex problems in science and medicine. They see the world differently than us.

World Autism Month (Post #2):

Forgive me as this was done in a sort of stream of
consciousness manner and there will be typos and much rambling. But it's all raw and real.
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Recently, I was speaking to a friend about making plans to play table tennis at a new table tennis bar out here (Club Spin), and told him I wasn't sure if I could bring the family with us because Taiyo has autism and can't tolerate loud environments. His response was "your son has autism? What is it with this...why so many kids?" And then he cracked a joke that at first enraged me, and later broke my heart. He said, "He must have gotten that from you, because you're simple."

BEFORE you destroy him for being a jerk, allow me to give some context. He and I are good friends, and we have a long history of exchanging (friendly) slams and quips. So his intent was to make fun of me, which is our tradition and something I encourage generally speaking.
Also, English is his second language, and he is originally from a 3rd world country that I suspect does not have the same attitudes toward ASD as we do (Although that is definitely an assumption of mine so both he and his country shall remain anonymous).

What made me sad was that, for a brief moment it tapped into a part of me that has always been there...the sense of guilt I have regarding Taiyo's ASD. Was it out fault? What could we have done? Could we have done more/less prenatally? Genetics? The list goes on....
And the guilt continues. Are we making the right decisions to mitigate the negative aspects of his ASD? What about his diet? Therapy? Education? Are we equipping him with the tools he needs to function with us "normies." Unfortunately, our society over-values social graces and articulation. These are not my son's strong points. Many ASD kids are seen as aloof, weird, goofy, quirky, rude, dumb or dangerous.

When we received the diagnosis, Danielle and I were devastated. Like, 'death in the family' devastated. But looking back, we realized our devastation was directly related to our ignorance about the condition. Now that I've become more educated on the subject, I realize it's not necessarily a bad thing. I know that, while there are significant challenges ahead for him, he can cultivate his differences to an advantage, but there is no guarantee of that. It may ultimately be a serious disadvantage for him. Will he develop an algorithm that will all us to travel through time? Or will he be living with us for the rest of his life? The future, while bright always comes with a caveat. This dichotomy makes for a lot of uncertainty, which is contrasted with our other two neurotypical boys.

So, how can I expect people to be educated and understand ASD when I myself was not? I can't. And as parent of an ASD kid, who works in medicine, and likes to read research for fun, I get that I have certain tools that an average person does not. Hell, it seems like none of us have much bandwidth these days. I can only share, educate, bring awareness, and do the best I can by my son and others like him.

As for my friend and his insensitive joke... that interaction highlighted one of my biggest fears: I am very worried about how people will treat Taiyo when he gets older. Ignorant, uneducated people can be horrible toward people with ASD. I don't want him to be bullied or harassed by people because he's different. People instinctively respond to aberrant behavior poorly, and sometimes that behavior can be mistaken for other more insidious things by medical personnel, teachers, and worst of all, law enforcement. It was a teachable moment, and we have since talked. I'm not sure I got through to him because he seemed suspicious of what I was saying, but with repeated exposure...perhaps he'll get it someday. That's how we win this.

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Do any of you have a kid or relative on the spectrum?

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Blog: "Holy Chtchet!" ⇝

Projects: Player Equipment Grid ⇝ Comprehensive Thin Inverted Chopping Rubbers Grid ⇝ Please send me corrections or new submissions

World Autism Month (Post #3)

Taiyo, like most autsies, is lovably quirky. His interests are nothing like his peers. While they play sports and play with super hero action figures; he collects clocks, numbers, trains, and loves to print pictures of fire alarms and smoke detectors (he’s also done this with trains and numbers). He then loves to number the things he collects with sticky notes.

Today he insisted we make a video of his room to show off his smoke detector/fire alarm picture collection. Then we showed off his clock collection (just those in his room, he has just as many throughout the house).

As an Easter gift, he's not asking for candy or toys. He wants smoke detectors, fire alarms, and fire pulls. (If you have any old ones laying around, please let me know .

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Blog: "Holy Chtchet!" ⇝

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Hey Japs, I can somewhat understand where you're at with this. A previous relationship I played step father to two boys with Aspergers. Very challenging and frustrating. It was probably a big contributor to relationship breakdown with their mother. I then later dated a woman who said she had Aspergers but I found her to be lower on the spectrum than what you'd expect in the high function that is typical there. She was a lovely person but had no filters and no way to cover whatever was going on in her mind at any time. It was an eye opening experience and whilst we didn't last together I learned a lot about how her life had been affected by her condition. She'd been from pillar to post from very young as her family had struggled to tolerate her behavior and had put her into homes just to keep the rest of the family functioning without massive disruptions she'd cause. As an adult she could look back on her childhood with some understanding of why things were done but she was also very jaded by it too. I don't envy your position but I think you have an opportunity for great reward as your child achieves things with your help...and if you can build tolerance into your other children you and they stand to reap great rewards there too. Best wishes.

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Japsican,

Do you have Taiyo playing table tennis yet? There really is something magic about table tennis.

We have an autistic group that comes in on Saturdays and it is very good for the kids: http://alamedattc.org/fcsntt.htm.

My gross oversimplification from one who has a limited understanding is this: Those who suffer from autism have challenges interacting with their environment. Table tennis is a sport that forces a very high level of interaction.

I remember one day around a year ago, the FCSN program director was practically bouncing off the walls when a young teen who had NEVER interacted with anyone outside her family began interacting during table tennis. Now she comes in the door with a giant ear to ear grin, waves and says hello. She LOVES coming to play.

We have also had some kids with developmental issues in our regular program, and it has really helped them. Kids can be very clicky and cruel. But, there is something about table tennis where when you step up to the table, all the rubbish is stripped away, everyone is equal, and your opponent is forced to respect you ability. You are probably not going to see a 70 year old man and and a 7 year old kid competing on equal footing on the basketball court. But I see that kind of thing all the time in table tennis.

Dave

That is along the lines I have also been thinking. Very high level of interaction but focused towards a very specific environment (a narrow set of elements). This is exactly the kind of situation where people with autism/asperger conditions may excel. Not all of them will find TT their primary preference, (sometimes due to motor skill inhibitions, sensitivity to sudden noises, or some unidentifiable reason) but the TT playing may still be a boost to them, a setting where they manage themselves, are allowed to put their attention to minute details.

It's been a while since I saw it in practice, and I didn't put a lot of mind to it at the time (it was some 30-35 years ago, in my late teens/early twenties I assisted in a sports club for the disabled). This thread jogged my memory. Thanks for reminding me! I must bring those thoughts forward in the club.

RE: Table Tennis for ASD people.

ASD is a spectrum as I've said above, and therefore folks will have different responses to different environments. But for some it can indeed work well to deal with "symptoms" (if that's what you want to call them).

In actuality, most kids on the spectrum have auditory sensitivities. Believe it or not, because clubs/training halls are fairly loud, taking most autists who haven't developed tools (Children) to cope with the loud noises; being around the constant droning of the balls can be super overwhelming. For example, Taiyo is far more afraid of the TT club and all of it's noises than say, a steam train or a rock concert. All autists have very specific things they clue in on, and it could be a particular sound or a particular visual. And there is no one-sized fits all approach. I've tried many times to get him to the club with me, but he just won't go. It turns into a fight for life and death where his pulse goes up to 160....literally...because in his head it's a life and death situation. In a controlled environment that has dampened sound and only one game going on at a time, he's fine with TT. Like many autists, he lacks fine motor dexterity and has dyspraxia, and so sports that are more technical with lots of fine motor, tend to be very frustrating for him. And instead of being relaxing, it causes him to have outbursts. Still I do push him into uncomfortable places to help him develop coping strategies, because he has the hallmark ASD issue of having developed lots of irrational fears.

Each sense can either be calming or upsetting for an ASD kid. For those less triggered by auditory stimulation, TT is a wonderful tool. Any sport is a wonderful tool really if you can get them to do it. For others visual or tactile stimulation can either the upsetting sensory stimuli that sets them off.

For kids who can tolerate lots of touching, Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, Judo, or Wrestling can be wonderful as well. And while there is lots of fine motor technique involved, there are LOTS of gross motor movements in BJJ and he tends to respond to that better. Taiyo and I regularly have small 15-30 minute BJJ sessions at home and I teach him how to roll and do different submissions. He likes that and does them quite well. But again, I do this at home in a controlled environment with little else to stimulate him. At a dojo, he can deal for a while but has to call it quits in 15 minutes.

For the most part taiyo is very pleasant and "normal". So if you were to meet him, it would take a while to even see he has autism. That's why people often refer to it as the "Hidden" disease.

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Blog: "Holy Chtchet!" ⇝

Projects: Player Equipment Grid ⇝ Comprehensive Thin Inverted Chopping Rubbers Grid ⇝ Please send me corrections or new submissions