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 Post subject: Re: Chuck Norris
PostPosted: 08 Mar 2012, 21:19 
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Ping Pong Diplomat
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chuck norris doesnt do push ups....he pushes the world down

chuck norris doesnt sleep...he waits...

chuck norris can divide by zero


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 Post subject: Re: Chuck Norris
PostPosted: 08 Mar 2012, 22:45 
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Chop the Ball not the Beard!
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A lion once put his head inside the mouth of Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can play Call of Duty on an Atari 2600
Chuck Norris doesn't take painkillers, he kills pain.
Chuck Norris makes WWE look like the new Teletubbies.
There's no such thing as earthquakes; only grunts when Chuck Norris is pissed off!
If you can do it, Chuck Norris can do it better
Chuck Norris hit a home run, he didn't swing the bat, he just scared the ball out of the park.
Chuck Norris broke a mirror and got 7 years of GOOD luck.

Mannn i really like Chuck Norris,
But I love his Facts....

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 Post subject: Re: Chuck Norris
PostPosted: 08 Mar 2012, 23:54 
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When Alexander Bell invented the telephone, he had 2 missed calls from Chuck Norris.

When the Diablo 3 development team added the auction house to the game, there was already an item up for sale. It was a scroll of town portal to Diablo 4, posted by Chuck Norris.


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 Post subject: Re: Chuck Norris
PostPosted: 09 Mar 2012, 06:39 
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Chuck Norris is so fast he can punch himself in the back of the head.

Tough guys eat nails for breakfast. Chuck Norris goes grocery shopping at the hardware store.

Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun. And won.

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 Post subject: Re: Chuck Norris
PostPosted: 09 Mar 2012, 09:08 
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Pips for Breakfast! Mmmm. Beary Nice!
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Attachment:
chucknorris.jpg
chucknorris.jpg [ 25.68 KiB | Viewed 1072 times ]

From http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/

Some of the better ones ...

Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting ... he goes Killing!

Space is continuously expanding because other galaxies are running away from Chuck Norris!

If Chuck Norris wants your opinion, he'll beat it into you!

Chuck Norris once played with Legos. The Ancient Egyptians still thank him for it.

Humans wear sunglasses. The sun wears Chuckglasses.

When Chuck Norris plays pac-man the ghosts stay in their box.

Latin insulted Chuck Norris. It's now a dead language!

Chuck Norris can tap dance through a mine field ... wearing clown shoes!

Every year in Spain, the bulls go running with Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris fell off his bike once. The road got Chuck rash.

If it smells like chicken, tastes like chicken, but Chuck Norris says it's beef ... it's f&@$%ing beef!

Chuck Norris ate the dingo that ate your baby.

Chuck Norris was an only child ... eventually.

When Geronimo skydives, he screams, "Chuck Norris!"

The truth hurts because Chuck Norris punched it.

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 Post subject: Re: Chuck Norris
PostPosted: 09 Mar 2012, 09:10 
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It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 minutes

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 Post subject: Re: Chuck Norris
PostPosted: 09 Mar 2012, 09:35 
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LOL Great lines guys! :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

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 Post subject: Re: Chuck Norris
PostPosted: 09 Mar 2012, 09:51 
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Chuck Norris can speak brail

Chuck Norris won American Idol using only sign language

Fear of spiders is arachnophobia, fear of tight spaces is claustrophobia, fear of Chuck Norris is called logic

Death once had a near-Chuck Norris experience

Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet

Chuck Norris has already been to Mars, that is why there are no signs of life

The only time Chuck Norris made a mistake is when he thought he had made a mistake

Once a cop pulled Chuck Norris over. Chuck Norris respects the law, and left the cop with a warning

Chuck Norris can cut through a hot knife with butter

Chuck Norris won the world series of poker using pokemon cards :rock:

Chuck Norris is the reason that Waldo is hiding

Chuck Norris once went in a semi-truck's gas tank as a joke... that truck is now known as Optimus Prime :o

Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack, his heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him

Chuck Norris can unscramble an egg :D

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 Post subject: Re: Chuck Norris
PostPosted: 28 Jun 2012, 18:03 
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Chuck Norris is the reason the Easter Bunny hides his eggs.

If you live to see Christmas, that is your Christmas present from Chuck.


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 Post subject: Re: Chuck Norris
PostPosted: 28 Jun 2012, 20:03 
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Dark Knight
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This thread always cracks me up... some really classic lines here :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

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 Post subject: Re: Chuck Norris
PostPosted: 29 Jun 2012, 00:06 
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The only unhackable computer firewall in the world...is called Chuck Norris!

The only prison that cannot be broken out of has photos of Chuck Norris...as the walls!

The only reason Superman isn't called Chuck Norris is because Superman isn't real.

The only thing Chuck Norris fears is looking into a mirror...cos nothing comes close to how scary Chuck Norris is.

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 Post subject: Re: Chuck Norris
PostPosted: 29 Jun 2012, 04:20 
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Chuck Norris doesnt push himself off the earth when doing pushups, he pushes the earth away from him
You can't name a bridge after Chuck Norris, no one can cross Chuck Norris
The Chinese are the best at table tennis because Chuck Norris allows them to
Chuck Norris doesnt swim, water justs wants to be with him
No one can beat Chuck Norris in anything, he simply lets them lose
Chuck Norris doesnt need instruments to play music, his farts can play Scheherazade, Flight of the Bumblebee and Sabre Dance at the same time

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 Post subject: Re: Chuck Norris
PostPosted: 29 Jun 2012, 09:27 
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Darth Vader really died because he failed Chuck Norris for the last time.

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 Post subject: Re: Chuck Norris
PostPosted: 29 Jun 2012, 15:31 
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Count Darkula
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Bruce Lee was Chuck Norris' apprentice! :lol:

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 Post subject: Re: Chuck Norris
PostPosted: 18 Jul 2012, 22:52 
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Each of Chuck Norris's biceps is bigger than the other one.

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