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PostPosted: 05 Jan 2009, 07:56 
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speedplay wrote:
Der_Echte, you are talking about the 900 series, while still being to fast for the normal player, this is nothing compared to the original Schildkröt.


Yes, what had happened is that after the Chinese received their original shipment of 100 blades they could not believe how fast and powerful they were so they wanted to buy another 10,000 for all their elite players and still have some to spare for the future. When they received the new shipment the blades didn't play anything like the original batch, so they sent a sample bat to be analysed by the Americans, and this is where it ties in with your story Der_Echte.

The original radiated blades are safe to play with because of the way they were radiated. The Americans had a real problem trying to figure out how the bat was nuclear active. They didn't realise that the bats had been radiated. Instead they used radio active material in the bat composition!!! which made them totally unsafe for human use.

If you want the real deal you need the same blade as shown in Reb's pictures. As you will notice from the second picture the radiation reacts with the glue and makes it really hard to remove rubbers from the blade. It is in part this reaction that makes the balls go so fast, because the rubber and blade become like one racket, totally united, which makes it really difficult to separate afterwards.

@Reb next time you glue a rubber onto an original Schildkröt you have to use some lead spray so that the sponge does not fuse with the wood.

I am starting to get worried about this thread. All this information is top secret. Might be an idea to remove the pics and delete this thread. If the chinese find out we know their secret training weapon they will not be happy.... But before we do I am sure others might have some valuable information to share, so be quick!

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PostPosted: 05 Jan 2009, 08:03 
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I will review the one and only "Neun Hundert" model. It is pushing 2 AM here and I am expecting the camp mail at some God-Awful time around O'Dark Thirty. I expect my modified bionic body parts to come in along with my fresh roasted whole beans that makes a life saving cup of De-friggin'-Licious Jo. I might be writing the review on impulse coffee power alone, so look carefully for incorrekt grammar and spellinks. 5 degrees Celcius is still shorts/t-shirt wearing weather in the Midwest/northern US, Sweden, and many other parts of the world, but after many months of 50-55 Celcius, it feels pretty damned chilly.

The "original" Schildkröt that you refer to is known in German circles as "Der Echte Schildkröt" - which is ironic as you all know my screen name is Der_Echte.

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PostPosted: 05 Jan 2009, 23:56 
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Now Der I can tell you, if you HAD an original/real deal/Der_Echte Schildkrot there with you in deepest chilliest Iraq at night, you would not need a jacket. The warmth off the bat would be enough. In fact you could make a great Cuppa-Jo just by resting the cup with water and beans in it right on the bat! I have a feeling that it might blow your position to the enemy though, because it would show up on their radar screens like a fleet of scuds had just been released. If you did have it though, you could end the war simply by decimating the place with 40mm balls of destruction.

I look forward to learning more from your writings about this legendary piece of equipment. I think its fascinating. Mind you, I do wonder if everything you've stated is factual, or if you've enjoyed a little poetic licence with some of your accounts?

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PostPosted: 06 Jan 2009, 10:17 
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Ending a war that way would cause an entirely unacceptable level of collateral damage and is counterproductive to the progress made in the last year. The terrorists who I really want to nuetralize/eliminate are the domestic ones - the ones who drive drunk and kill tens of thousands plus per year in my country alone. Well, that is going too political and I'll get back to topic.

I seriously doubt that anyone would associate Der_Echte with either being poetic nor having a licence of any sort to do anything. Der_Echte just does it. Wait a minute. That sounded too much like Nike's marketing slogan.

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PostPosted: 06 Jan 2009, 11:14 
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I hear quite a few of the top chinese national players ARE actually using this bat, but they change the handle of the bat, to something of the brand of their sponsor, so it looks like the sponsor's bat.

This is actually quite common practice among the top chinese players... not sure how common it is outside China...

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PostPosted: 06 Jan 2009, 11:33 
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Here is the full review of our Mythical Model 900

Ole Matthew Syed is up the the marketing task of selling slow-as-crap, but he himself is a mystical/majical dude who defeats legions of aspiring players to win several major championships.

Image


Schildkröt 900 Full Review

I know. EVERONE has been waiting to see the full review of the infamous Schildkröt 900 like an 8 year old boy who has to go to the bathroom something terrible and is just holding it the best he can, but whose mother has sent him to the corner for a “timeout” to delay his trip to the loo. You all have to understand the logistics involved in performing this review. You simply just don’t acquire a REAL 900 model real easy like. The national spy agencies of several major countries have failed for years end. Then you have to factor in the Personal Protective Equipment (PPE), the welfare of the individuals involved in testing, and of course the special equipment and facilities needed to do a proper test.

How did I get a hold of one of 900 models? Well, if I told you, then you too would do the same and we wouldn’t want that, would we?

Schildkröt is known in the TT world for making incredibly slow (think why they use a turtle for their marketing) premade rackets that play like you are pulling your head inside your shell. Well, Schildkröt WAS the laughingstock of the TT world, but no more since they busted out the ultimate weapon - the 900 model after years of secret research and testing at considerable cost, materials, injury to personnel, and major collateral damage. Now, when the Schildkröt player holds the 900 in his or her hand, it is the opponent who must stick his head into his shell and hunt a hole in a hurry. Schildkröt wants everyone to “Fear the Turtle” in a major way. When you hear someone utter that slogan, just leave the TT hall. It is for you own good.

Well, enough of the lame excuses. Let’s see how this dog barks.

Schildkröt’s marketing machine says:
A 5 ply with reverse 1.5mm sponge, ITTF Approved
Schildkrot 5 Star Cool rubber in Red and Black
A high quality, value bat designed to assist the improving player in their stroke development and match play
ST HANDLE ONLY

Der_Echte’s real No-Shit Observations…Are you kidding me??!! The 900 model has more offensive capabilities than the war departments of most major powers. It is cloaked in secrecy and myth befitting of the wildest of Cold War shenanigans. Just 5 Stars? Get real. Anyway, Schildkröt just HAD to make the packaging Plain-Jane, so that rival spies would not intercept them from reaching the Chinese national Squad.

Speed: Fast with a capital F. Supersonic on the low end, impulse warp speed on medium strokes, beyond Mr. Sulu and CPT Kirk’s comprehension on power shots. There is not a piece of TT equipment to compare it to. You have to use the Enterprise or similar space ships.

Control: Possible only with some seriously extreme training, the right technique, and a fortune of Personal Protective Equipment. Control is always relative, so it is hard to define. If you manage to get the racket angle correct, the ball will move out and ricochet off the table like a bat outta hell.

Spin: The ball moves too fast for any camera of any make of any ultrafast shutter speed to detect. With the 900, just like the rest of the Schildkröt lineup, I suspect you don’t generate any measurable levels of spin. The 900 model simply doesn’t need it. If your shot misses the table, it will likely hit your opponent. That is pretty much all you need to finish the point or the match. On serves, you have to hit the ball with your thumb or wrist to land it on the other side. But don’t worry. If you move into position for the return, there is NO returning your counter.

Thickness: The blade is exactly 6.9 mm thick, including the 15% foreign materials. In the history of 900 article, you read that they used Titanium, Enriched Uranium, Fastidium Weave ™ (one of the materials they invented), and a newly discovered treatment to stiffen steel and for the rubbers, nano-ground BTY Bryce combined with Alien skin grafts taken from Aliens incubated from leftover experimental stem cells all slow-cooked to perfection inside a mini scale nuclear reactor.

Tackiness: Not important. I suspect it is entirely devoid of any tackiness, just like any other Schildkröt premade.

Weight: Under negative 1400 grams (Varies by batch) The energy emitting and advanced geometric properties give this beast its negative weight.

Price: 10 British Pounds. That is for the regular series. The REAL costs in developing this monster are incalculable.

Durability: Very suspect. There are entirely too many unstable radioactive and experimental materials used. Also, what kind of glue would hold this s*** together for any length of time? You also have to consider that numerous national spy agencies with legions of spies with a free license to kill are out to get their paws on the REAL 900, so durability is not expected to be so much, just like the premades.

Throw Angle: Lower than anything you have ever used. Laser beams don’t have such a low throw angle.

Power: Even Superman would get his fool self kilt standing in front of one of the drives of the 900 without advanced training and PPE. You land a drive. It bounces of the table, tears through anything in its path and comes to rest somewhere in the Asteroid Belt. Milliseconds later, you hear the sonic boom and see the vapor trail.

Ball Feeling: Like the regular Schildkröt lineup, there is absolutely zero ball feeling, except dead. With the 900, the only feeling you get is world domination.

Who this bat is for: Anyone who wants destroy his opponent, the TT hall, and anything else in the path of the ball.

Match Performance: No one has completed an entire match using the 900. The opponent can only dodge the drives for so long before getting laser tagged and defaulting the match.

Summary: You have to calculate your chances using the 900. On one side, you dominate the world using it, but you have to go to sleep sometime and then the thousands of dangerous international spies have an easy time getting it away from you. I feel it is best to use it like I did – for a moment or two, then give it over to the commander of the next space shuttle mission to be released into outer space like the dozens of tools and equipment that invariably slip from the hands of the space walkers.

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PostPosted: 06 Jan 2009, 11:53 
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Wow, awesome review!!! ... hope you don't get in trouble for making this infomation public! :violent3:

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PostPosted: 07 Jan 2009, 15:31 
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Next forum member up for the 900 review. Haggisv? Silver? Tommy from DTTW??!! Ct Drkla? Dark Horse?

The 900 I tested is orbiting somewhere in the ionosphere, but can still be retrieved on the next space mission.

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PostPosted: 07 Jan 2009, 22:48 
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Nah, I haven't used the 900 and have never actually played with any Schildkrot bat. Only done work on the one legendary real deal and made the mistake of bouncing a ball on it! :oops:

I would like to see a review of you T-8 with the Rapid Duo on it though Der! I had Rapid Soft on mine and it was ok. I got hold of a sheet of Tenergy 05 to try on it though, so I'm in the throws of that now. But I'd like to know how the more powerful Rapids perform on the T-8. :wink:

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S/U 3: Blade: Bty Gergely . No rubbers...thinking of adding Red Dtecs and Black Rasant
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PostPosted: 07 Jan 2009, 23:52 
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:idea: This must be why I like the Schildkrot ball so much it must be made to stand up to this bat. It always felt a little harder, and made a totally different noise when hit.

I'd liken it to your Australian cricket balls The kookaburra. These are known in England as bat breakers because they are made to stand up to your firm and abrasive turf conditions. The lack of a stand out seam also gives our bowlers problems :cry: .

You Aussies only beat us because of your equipment. Adham come to cricket we need you :wink:

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PostPosted: 08 Jan 2009, 00:12 
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Some really great reviews on the schildkrot 900 above! :lol: Well all I can add is that I have gone ahead and put the question to the ITTF President Adham sharara when he gets the time to answer our questions in his own thread 'If my schildkrot 900 bat will pass the enez testing machine?' I am still waiting for his answer but will report back once he has bothered! :D


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PostPosted: 08 Jan 2009, 00:26 
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Good on you Tommy!! But I think Adham will give you a general answer, or he might refer it to his equipment committee as he is not too equipment literate (or not willing to admit to being). :lol:

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S/U 1: Blade: Bty Gergely . FH Black Andro Rasant 2.1 . BH Red Tibhar Grass Dtecs
S/U 2: Blade: Bty Gergely . FH Black Hexer+ 2.1 . BH Red GD Talon
S/U 3: Blade: Bty Gergely . No rubbers...thinking of adding Red Dtecs and Black Rasant
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PostPosted: 08 Jan 2009, 00:52 
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@Reb, Maybe i should make a post explaining to Adham that the mere mention of the schildkrot 900 at DTTW can result in posts and threads being deleted immediately as soon as they are noticed as the fear of this evil bat can ruin a TT forum within hours!

I could also point out to Adham Sharara that I have the life insurance to use the schildkrot 900 all payed for! and the space suit needed to use the Schildkrot 900 and had my arm amputated and replaced with a robotic one for the use of this bat so what was the point of all this if it doesn't even pass this bloody enez thing? :cry:


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PostPosted: 08 Jan 2009, 02:23 
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Wow Tommy, you have definitely gone to the extremes to use it I must say. In that case, I think it would be worthwhile pleading your case to Adham and getting official ITTF approval to use it!! :wink:

The only thing you may have to do is take out third party life insurance as well, because its probably more your opponents in danger than you! :roll:

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S/U 1: Blade: Bty Gergely . FH Black Andro Rasant 2.1 . BH Red Tibhar Grass Dtecs
S/U 2: Blade: Bty Gergely . FH Black Hexer+ 2.1 . BH Red GD Talon
S/U 3: Blade: Bty Gergely . No rubbers...thinking of adding Red Dtecs and Black Rasant
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PostPosted: 08 Jan 2009, 04:40 
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So you can appreciate that after spending many years in training and £1000's of my own cash and losing my right arm I may not even get to use this bat? I am loking into the Cornileau hobby bat 100 just incase but this bat only has a topspeed of 15 mph compared to the 600 mph of the Schildkrot 900 :cry:

I have been considering asking Adham while I have the opportunity what shampoo and conditioner he use's? becouse I have long admired the glossy sheen he achieves and I would really like to get my hair that way.


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